This year, I have an extremely interesting 7th-period class. There are no words to describe them. I love them, but they're interesting. They're hyper, moody, angry, loving, sweet, and feisty all at the same time. It's crazy! One day last week, I asked one of the kids if he was going to behave today in class because he normally doesn't. Well, it's not that he's misbehaving. He just won't stop talking. Ever. Non-stop talking. For 51 minutes. Ok, maybe not 51 minutes. Sometimes he goes to the bathroom. Anyway, I asked him if he was going to be good today. His response? "I don't know, Mrs. Scott. Sometimes my glaucoma be hurtin', and I can't act right." Oh. Ok. I didn't even respond to him. I just accepted the fact that he wasn't going to be good. And he wasn't.
Being the new teacher on campus is like being the new girl in the class. All the boys want to talk to you or have your attention and the girls hate you because you're stealing their shine. Like with all schools at the beginning of the year, there was a little chaos with scheduling. Rosters change every class period, so it's impossible to really know who belongs where in the beginning. Enter J. J came to my class the first day of school. He wasn't on my roster, so I penciled him in. J came to my class every day, took notes, and did the work. Over the weekend, I updated my roster, so I could have an accurate roster for the upcoming week. Lo and behold, J isn't even in my class. When we got back to school on Monday, I told him that he's been going to the wrong class and that he needed to get a new schedule to follow. The gag is he knew that he was going to the wrong class. He had English 4th period then came to me and took English again 5th period. Apparently, he thinks I'm pretty and that meant he should be in my class. After I finally got him to go to his 5th-period class, we had Open House. Do you know that he brought his mom by to meet me? She was so embarrassed. I was tickled.
I walk around my classroom while I teach to help with behavior issues and other classroom management things. Friday, my kids were working independently. It was their first work on your own activity, and I wanted to make sure that everybody was working alone. While walking around, I noticed a kid measuring his thumb with a ruler. He was quiet, so I didn't ask questions. Then I heard, "Man, my dick ain't THIS short!" *clutches pearls* The kids around him start slapping him telling him to look up. I'm standing there embarrassed. He looks up and sees me standing there and he's embarrassed. He starts apologizing and explaining. Apparently, somebody told him that a guy's thumb is the same size as his penis when it's soft. He tells me this and there is further embarrassment. The kids who can hear this conversation are DYING laughing because he just won't stop. He's trying to explain the blunder away, but he's making it worse. I just told him to put the ruler up and give me 25 push-ups for being inappropriate in class.
My classroom has hardwood floors that are really pretty, but my feet and legs hurt so bad by the end of the day. What can I do? I don't want any issues with my bones and muscles from it. I haven't tried gel insoles yet. That's my next thing. I don't want to be an old lady!
Do any high school teachers follow me? Let's collaborate! Most blogs I read and/or follow are elementary or middle school. I want to read some high school stuff! Drop some links or emails, so we can connect!
K. Scott
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